August 2007

Hi peeps! Here is my selection of this month's showbiz shenanigans that I've covered. The Spice Girls announced a re-union tour at the O2 Arena -Millennium Dome- this month. It's taken years to get the girls to talk to one another, never mind organizing a world tour. Despite these 'minor' difficulties they have pulled it off -as they were running low on cash- and the tour starts December 7 in Los Angeles. At the press conference the girls were very chirpy as always and relishing the £10 million they are each pocketing for the tour. Virgin records -their label- has wisely offered them a private jet each for the tour. This way they are far less likely to stab each other before the tour ends. The girls looked good generally though Gerri Halliwell -Ginger Spice- looked very matronly with a dodgy looking large flowery dress, whilst Mel B -Scary Spice- had an ill fitting red skirt and, yes, her bum looked huge in it! Emma Bunton - Baby Spice- is with child -pregnant- and she looked great for it. The world tour will be a mobile creche and a "shag fest" as the girls said at the press conference because their husbands/boyfriends will be there too.

The Spice Girls

More than 60,000 people joined Prince William and Prince Harry at the new Wembley Stadium to celebrate the life of their mother Diana, Princess of Wales. Over 15 million people all over Britain watched The Concert For Diana on TV and it was broadcast to more than 500 million households in 140 countries. Performers included: LILY ALLEN, WILL YOUNG, P DIDDY, ROD STEWART, NELLY FURTADO, JOSS STONE, ELTON JOHN, BRYAN FERRY, PHARRELL WILLIAMS, TOM JONES, NATASHA BEDDINGFIELD, FERGIE, ANDREW LLOYD WEBBER, DURAN DURAN and erm, STATUS QUO. The atmosphere at the gig was superb with the crowds really enjoying themselves and watching Prince William and Prince Harry dancing and having a good time at the concert which made it a very memorable event. At the end of the concert William and Harry thanked everyone involved in making the evening a huge success. Prince William said: "For us, this has been the most perfect way of remembering her. And this is how she would want to be remembered." I do think that her previous lovers should've been invited. They would want to remember her that way too. Then again, perhaps not a good idea as there were only half a dozen empty seats left.

Prince William and Prince Harry

The London premiere of Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix was the usual fan packed premiere with legions of fans from all over the world present. Despite the torrential downpour -global warming, my ar- e!- at the premiere the fans stayed upbeat braving the elements to catch a glimpse of their idols. The latest installment of the Harry Potter franchise directed by David Yates attracted quite a few celebs to the Odeon in Leicester Square. The green carpet at the premiere was soaked and the fire retardant foam on it began to ooze out and made a mess of the guests' footwear. Celebs attending included: JOANNA K ROWLING, DANIEL RADCLIFFE, EMMA WATSON, RUPERT GRINT, JODIE KIDD, LILY ALLEN, model SOPHIE DAHL and the usual gaggle of c-listers including PEACHES GELDOF. DANIEL RADCLIFFE was once again all smiles and wearing an identical suit to the one he wore at the previous HP premiere. LILY ALLEN looked cute but if only she didn't have those thunder thighs. Still, her dress covered the worst bits and she gave us plenty of poses. SOPHIE DAHL looked superb. Considering how fat she used to be years ago, she is now quite svelte. Not that I like very thin women. I like curvy women. I'm only talking about the excess of erm -fat- curves. That's that cleared up.

Daniel Radcliffe

Lily Allen

London celebrated India's 60th year of independence with over 1400 events in 'India Now'. Crowds gathered to take in the the spectacular vision of the floating 'Taj Majal' being unveiled at Tower Bridge. The lovely SHILPA SHETTY was one of the guests at the South Bank overseeing the cultural events taking place. Other guests included: the ever unpopular KEN LIVINGSTONE, SEBASTIAN COE, designer MANISH ARORA and the Indian cricket team.

Shilpa Shetty

For summer music festivals one of the best ever is ROSKILDE in Denmark. The festival is on for four days or so and is far better organized than Glastonbury. Headlining acts included THE WHO, THE RED HOT CHILLY PEPPERS, BASEMENT JAXX, ARCTIC MONKEYS and BJORK. I refused to go to Glastonbury this year as the forecast correctly predicted a 3 day monsoon. The last Glastonbury I covered 2 years ago was totally immersed in mud and I didn't want that c--p again. This is precisely what the crowds this year got. Yuk. The last straw for me 2 years ago was when there was a power cut in the VIP bar area and all the bottles of champagne in the fridge were warm. I nearly walked out. Roskilde was fab and although the weather was hideously wet for the first day eventually it dried out enough for an enjoyable fest. OK, being in the VIP area always helps and the champagne was cold. Everyone was so friendly. I love the Danes. The biggest disappointment was The Red Hot Chilly Peppers as they performed a luke warm totally BORING set! It was the worst performance I've ever seen them play. Lacklustre, motionless and they opened the set with an instrumental! I kid you not. Never watch them again, they've lost the will to live. So instead of pics of the moribund Red 'Hot'? Peppers here's a pic of me in comatose mode in the lovely, civilized, cultured and clean city of Copenhagen where my friends and I went after the festival to chill out.

Joe Alvarez

Over and out, see ya next month.


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Words and pictures copyright Joe Alvarez 2007.

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